STILLETTO EYE & RAZORGUT by DWAYNE COLTRANE & THE HYPERDEATHPSYCHOROCK 3

Chapter 4 - STILLETTO EYE & RAZORGUT AND THE CHAMBER OF THE SNAKE PRIESTESS

StilletoEye and RazorGut drove Betsy, their 55 Cadillac, along the uneven grass and out from under the thick, dense forest. A butterfly two foot-wide fluttered into their windscreen and bounced off. There were still vines and moss caught in the bonnet, streaming back like banners.

They could see a fire and people up ahead by some caves. There were a small handful of men and women gathered around the gaping corpse of what looked like an antelope, roasting sections of it on sticks in the fire. They looked aghast as Besty screamed to a halt next to them, and one of the men roared at StilletoEye and RazorGut while one woman screamed and fainted.

The huddle didn’t seem to be able to speak, they only grunted and vaguely pointed, but StilletoEye and RazorGut managed to make themselves understood, and got two milkshakes and cheeseburgers.

The cave people entertained themselves with a rudimentary sing-song, banging on rocks and moaning at the same time….StilletoEye and RazorGut went to Betsy and cranked up Louis Jordan on the radio.

At the noise, the mean and women became frantic, desperately signalling to StilletoEye and RazorGut but couldn’t make them comprehend….the trees in the distance started to shake, and the ground rumbled.

A Tyrannosaurus Rex burst out of the cover and snapped up two of the men in one bite, swinging their gore over the rest…the rest ran into the cave, and StilletoEye and RazorGut jumped into Betsy and drove in after them.

The cave went on a lot further than they’d expected, and the cave people didn’t have torches, so StilletoEye and RazorGut turned on the headlights, and cruised on.
The cave sloped steeply downwards, and the walls were carved with increasingly intricate murals of snakes devouring men and beasts. The pictures terrified the cave people.

The passageway levelled out after a while, and the walls were lined with torches. StilletoEye and RazorGut dimmed Betsy’s lights and crept apprehensively along.

They came into a wide, ornate chamber; everything was made of gold, and there was gold piled on everything. The cave people howled with fright. A slithering echoed around the chamber and StilletoEye and RazorGut saw one of the cavepeople leap off of the ground and point terrified at his feet. The ground was alive with vipers. StilletoEye and RazorGut stayed in the car.

The echoing slithering sound grew louder, and a ferocious shadow cast itself across the far wall. A gigantic snake with the upper torso and head of a beautiful woman wound itself around the gold pillars lining the chamber and bit into the closest cavewoman, her tail swiping another, crashing them into a pile of gold.

StilletoEye and RazorGut did a swift and tight circle of the chamber and sped out of the cave, back the way they came.

All around them they could see vipers lining the walls and dropping onto Betsy, but as they sped out into the sunlight above, they were all gone.